Daveportivo's Cultural Evaluation Facility

The Main Event Mafia Open The Show Again!: Kurt Angle says he's line about Foley getting the thorn of the rose. Angle says he did what he promised last week and took Foley's office by force. Kurt says he's in the Title Match at Sacrifice, he says yet again that whoever pins Kurt Angle will become leader of the Main Event Mafia. Kurt talks about tonights ten man tag and asks why its on free tv and why Foley didn't tell the main event mafia about it.

Mick Foley comes to the ring accompanied by Daniels. Mick says its no rumour there will be a ten man tag team contest inside the iMPACT! Foley says he's giving away a match of this magnitude because TNA needed a show of power. Foley puts over Sting's toughness. Foley talks about saving his friend with twenty five stiches saying how brave he is, Angle cuts him off and says "25 Stiches? I won a gold medal with a broken Friggin Neck", that was a great line. Foley introduces his team for tonight Daniels *appreciative cheer*, AJ *Big Cheer*, Samoa Joe *Indifference and boos*, Jeff Jarrett *Big Boos*. Foley promises to pin Angle and take over the main event mafia.

Jeff comes to ringside and rants at Foley. Foley apologises and say its always business and never personal, Jeff tells Foley to kiss his arse. Kurt them closes with some good lines. Okay opening segment, Angle was superb and Foley was pretty good, this was probably the best MEM opening segment to date.

Samoa Joe and the Mystery of the speeding car: Samoa Joe is dropped off in a car that speeds off before Lauren can see whose driving, ooooh what a mystery. I gather this is further forshadowing for the debut of Taz.

The commentary team bicker as Suicide picks up the win over Conseuences Creed: Suicide kicks Creed's legs out before scoring with a leg drop. Suicide gets a pair of corner closelines and then the STO takedown. They completely blow a crossbody spot. Creed comes back with a nice swinging neck breaker before unloading with a jab combo. Creed gets a low dropkick and then the set up elbow drop. Suicide responds with a really nice hard Irish whip and twisting russian leg sweep. Creed unloads but Suicide responds with a running Yakuza kick and then the running ace crusher into the second turnbuckle. Suicide follows up with a Finley roll but Creed flips out of the Suicide solution and hits the Yakuza kick and Enzenguri combo. Suicide hits Chest Stabber for the 1-2-3 out of nowhere.
Good short little match awkward in places, this was your typical TNA let the athletic guys go out there for four mintues and impress the crowd with no real backstory or consequence. At least Tenay and West are arguing over who suicide is rather than talking about the main event I suppose. (*1/4)

Matt Morgan talks with Foley: Matt Morgan is a complete goof, anyway inbetween his terrible jokes he wants a match to prove himself. Foley says tonight it'll be Matt Morgan against MEM security.

Velvet Sky is very scared: The Beautiful People are isanely scared, Love does a brilliant job of being a flakey heel, Velvet does a great job of putting over Kong as a monster. Its great to see The Beautiful People back to doing what they do best and away from the silly shit.

Taylor Wilde has a secret admirer: Taylor is best friend with Lauren apparently and they gossip about Taylor's secret admirer, Lauren of course is holding a microphone for their secret girl chat. Wilde says she has a date next tuesday and she wants Lauren to come for support, I'm sure Lauren will bring the microphone for that too.

Matt Morgan vs. MEM Security: Morgan shoves over and Sal and shakes his pecks, god I hate him so much. Morgan hits a shoulder tackle and Rocco tags in. Morgan can't shove big Rocco over and has to settle for a pair of elbows and a lame hip toss. Morgan floats over Rocco and hits a horrible looking closeline. Sal makes the save and unloads on Morgan. Sale hits a horrible chop and Sal holds Matt on the floor but Morgan kicks him off and pres Rocco off top. Morgan cleans house with closelines and whips the security into one another. A dropkicks sends Rocco out of the ring and the Carbon Footprint finishes Sal.
Well that was pretty horrible and didn't even make Matt Morgan look particularly impressive. (1/4*)

Mick Foley bans the guitar: After some Lame comedy abouting Tweeting on Twitter Foley says that Jeff's magic exploding guitar is banned from ringside.

Jethro Holiday and Eric Young cut a promo: Eric sounds like he's fed up with not being given anything to do and he says he has the secret to defeating Beer Money as he's beaten both men in singles competition before. Jethro blows snot on the floor and Lauren acts sickened.

Team 3D Tag Team Invitational Semi Final Match: Beer Money Inc. vs. Young and Holliday:
Its good to see Trevor Murdoch back to acting like a bad arse. Eric gets a roll up for a two count and then a crucifix pin for another quick two count, Young then gets a sunset flip for a two count. Storm hits Young with an enzenguri from the apron allowing Roode to hit the Double A spinebuster for a two count. Storm tags in and hits a face buster and a rock bottom combo and that sets up the Beer Money double suplex. Roode slaps on a chinlock, Young counters a hard Irish whip with the EY flip and then slides under Roode and hits a side belly to belly suplex.

HOT TAG! Murdoch unloads and gives Roode an inverted atomic drop, he dodges a closeline and Roode hits Storm, Murdoch hits a back body drop and a bulldog but Beer Money respond with a closeline back stabber combination for a very near fall. EY gets a blind tag and hits a double torpedo dropkick before body slamming Storm. Young hits the guillotine leg drop but the referee isn't there to see the pin. Holliday and Young have communication issues, Storm kills Young with a superkick and Beer Money hit the DWI for the 1-2-3.

Good Little tag team match up, Jethro is getting his gimmick over well and Beer Money continue to be general awesome. Unfortunately it still seems like we're watching potentially good tag team matches on fast forward but this was good while it lasted. (*3/4)

Silence You Say Nothing!!! Saeed calls Lauren and infidel and says that they will destroy all of Angelina's friends before the ultimate sacrifice. Kong says "dumb blondes, dead blondes".

Kong destroys Sky in a Stretcher Match: Velvet acts very scared but she dodges a closeline and unloads with some girly swings which Kong no sells. Sky manages to crawl away from an Awesome bomb but can't avoid a closeline and an impact buster. Kong then hits another Implant buster, the crowd chant one more time so Kong hits a third implant buster before putting her on the stretcher but Kong isn't finished and hits a two more implant busters before rolling Sky on the stretcher. The referee counts to six before Kong pulls her off and hits an Awesome Bomb and Earl Hebner does an extremely fast count.
This was fine for what it was a glorified angle. (1/2*)

More Doctor Stevie: Abyss is joking about the office an Stevie says he has a suprise for Abyss and he introduces Daffney. Stevie wants Abyss to transfer his agression to Daffney by training her for the first ever knock outs Monsters Ball match, oh boy this is stupid. Abyss agrees when Stevie threatens to beat Abyss.
This is so silly but this is what Abyss has become for better or worse. I hate monster's ball matches but I'm making a bold prediction the women's match will be better than any attempt Abyss as ever made at pulling of that retarded gimmick match.

Lethal Consequences acuse Daniels of being Suicide: This is a nice fun segment as Creed cuts a nice logical promo while Lethal interjects some ridiculous Savagism. Creed just wants Daniels to admit it. Daniels says Creed says they should spend more time concentrating on beating Suicide and less time figuring out who it is. Daniels calls Jay Lethal the biggest joke there is. Lethal bitch slaps Daniels an before a brawl breaks out the Guns music hits.

Shelley says this is a family show and they want to keep things friendly. Shelley talks about playing video, he says much like life Creed and Lethal aren't every good at video games. Shelley says at least when they battle with the Guns they go face to face they don't hide behind a mask like Daniels. The Guns then promise to unmask Suicide next week and they'll give everyone what they really want, tickets to the gun show.
Well that hit and miss but at least there trying to develope the undercar.

Sting confronts Jarrett: After Borash taunts Jeff about Foley's abuses of power, Sting says he's been denied a rematch and he wants in that match. Jeff says Sting can be in the match if he pins Foley but he will have to sacrifice something.

Love calls in the reinforcements: Love is scared stiff and calls in the reinforcements, she doesn't say who it is but teases "no man on woman violence". I suppose it was only a matter of time before I had to have Cute Kip James back on my TV and just as the women's division was getting good again.

The Main Even Mafia vs. Jarrett, Sting, Samoa Joe, Styles & Daniels: Steiner and Joe start in the ring and Joe scores with a Sambo suplex before hitting a flurry of jabs in the corner and tagging in Daniels. Joe body slams Scott and Daniels hits a flying cross body. Scott blocks a back body drop with a huge club and a hard closeline. Angle tags in and Daniels and Angle go to a wrestling sequence before Angle scores with a big European uppercut but Daniels responds with a leg larait. AJ tags in and he drives Kurt down onto the knees of Daniels in a unique spot.

Kurt tags Booker in and Book gets some big knee lifts but misses the arm wrench and side kick. AJ gets a body slam and then knee drop for a two count. Booker regains control with a spinning heel kick and Nash tags in. Nash clubs down AJ before tagging in Sting. Sting misses a closeline and AJ hits a dropkick, Sting no sells and pounds down AJ before Kurt tags back in and kills AJ with a kitchen sink for a near fall. Booker tags in and hits the high leg lariat before giving the crowd a spineroonie. Scott tags in and hits a side belly to belly suplex for a two count. Kurt tags in and plays to the crowd and goes for the Angle slam but AJ slips out and hits the Pele.

HOT TAG! Foley unloads with a swinging neckbreaker on Sting, Jeff gives Angle pedigree, Nash tries a powerbomb but Joe breaks it with an enzenguri and hits a suicide forearm strike. Daniels and AJ then hit the stereo planchas. Foley won't let Jeff use the barbed wire bat so Jeff kicks him in the balls and gives Foley the stroke on the bat, Sting sneaks in and makes the cover while Jeff hits the Stroke on Kurt Angle.

That was fine for what it was, exactly what you'd expect everyone coming in and hitting their spots in little twenty second burst, completely inconsiquential but basically what you'd expect for a TV main event. (*3/4)

What will Sting Sacrifice? Sting remains in the ring and says he's earned his spot in the match but he has to make a sacrifice, a black guy in the crowd goes "oooooh yeah", Sting then says if anyone pins him he will retire. Then in the gayest bit of TV ever he drops the microphone and the lights go out leaving only a spot light in the centre of the ring focusing on a the mic and the baseball bat, Keith Mitchell obviously thinks he's the Francis Ford Coppella of proffesional wrestling.

Overall Thoughts: Much better impact than last weeks abomination, had more focus and set up the main matches going forward to sacrifice. Other than the tag tournement there wasn't much wrestling to speak of and a hell of alot of storylines going on. TNA are definitely using the throw as much shit at the wall as possible and hope something sticks approach, and to be fair I think its working to an extend there should be at least one or two thinks that will interest you if watch this show. I really do like the amount of focus that Russo puts on the lower card making their storylines as much a focus as the main eventers, I just wish it was less silly and corny and more serious. Much improved but still a long way to go. (6/10)