Daveportivo's Cultural Evaluation Facility

We've entered the era of whacky graphics and it sthe return to McMahonamania on Commentary, Oh boy I forgot this was the show with that casket match. Ted Dibiase joins Vince on commentary.

.

Bigalow misses and avalanche but he scores with a sloppy dropkick before running into a sloppy closeline and two sloppy shoulderblocks. A dropkick and a crossbody get two for Tatanka. Tatanka gets an arm bar, Bam Bam shoots him off and Tatanka scores with a lovely DDT. Tatanka heads up top and misses with the flying cross body. Bam Bam scores with a butterfly blow in the corner. Bam Bam runs into a boot, Tatanka goes up top and goes for a sunset flip but Bam Bam sits down on top of him. Tatanka begins to unload but Bam Bam cuts him off with a sloppy looking dropkick. Bam Bam decides to go for a bearhug to the thrill of nobody. This is quite a lenghty process but I presume their saving their energy for the Rumble. Tatanka goes native and breaks the hold. Tatanka runs straight into a shoulderblock. Bam Bam follows up with another shoulderblock he tries it a third time and Tatanka counters with a powerslam. We go to a double crossbody collision spot, Tatanka bounced clean off Tatanka. Tatanka is channelling the spirit of the great buffalo. Bam Bam slugs Tatanka in the back of the head to put and end to that. Bigalow goes for the Moonsault but Tatanka rolls out of the way. Tatanka goes up top and scores with a flying crossbody for the win.

We go to a recap video of the Hart brothers falling out. Owen challenges Bret to a match up. Bret says people love to see a contraversal fight but under no circumstances would he ever step in the ring with his own brother, he won't do it. We then get a video of the two Hart's together saying their gonna win World Tag Tites. We then go to the footage of the Quebecers losing and winning the tag titles. We now go live with Bret and Owen. They say there together and there invincible and will take everyone on. Owen says he's gonna make Bret proud.

.

Pierre and Bret lock it up to start and Peirre shoves Bret around. Bret floats over Peirer but runs into a body slam. Bret comes back scoring with a kitchen sink. Owen Hart comes into the ring with flying axe handle. Owen flips around into an arm bar but gets swatted off. Owen scores with a hip toss for two. Peirre gets a hair drag takedown and Owen kips up. Jock comes back in and makes fun of Owen and then offers a handshake, Owen says no way. Jock gets an eye rake. Owen and Jock botch a flip counter spot so Owen improvises into a snap suplex and Jock crawls to his corner to talk to Jonny Polo. Owen scores with an enzenguri for a near fall. Bret comes in and they get the back breaker diving axe handle combo for two. Bret gets a small package for two, a sunset flip for two, and then a rolls up for two, when he's shot of Peirre levels Bret with a right hand. The Quebeccers try to whip the Hart's into each other but Bret Drops low and Owen gets a diving spear on Jock for two. The Quebeccers bail. Bret scores with the big gut punch. Bret slingshots Peirre into the ring and tags in Owen. Owen scores with a flying closeline for two, a gutwrench suplex gets another two and a leaping legdrop gets two. Bret comes back in, Bret dodges a back elbow but runs into a powerslam for two. Jock comes in and distracts the ref so Peirre can choke Bret with the tag rope. Bret runs into a gut kick. The Quebeccers score with a double double chop. Peirre scores with a rope rider for two. Jock comes in and scores with a back elbow. Peirre comes in and goes for a second rope move but eats boot. HOT TAG. Owen unloads with two dropkicks, a back body drop, a Greco Roman throw, a spinning heel kick and the Sharpshooter but the ref is trying to get Bret out of the ring and Peirre breaks it with a bulldog. The Quebbecers then double flap jack Owen onto the top rope. Owen dodges a double closeline and Owen scores with a double dropkick. Bret in, he unloads on both men, lamely, Bret scores with a dropkick, a side russian legsweep and a backbreaker. Bret then gives them a Noggin Knocker. Owen holds Jock on the apron and Bret tries bouncing off the ropes but Raven lowbridge him. Bret has injured the knee and the Quebeccers come off the steel steps with a leg drop on the injured knee. Jock hits Bret in the knee with a chair. While Owen tries to breake the count Jock hits Bret in the knee with the putter. Owen rolls Bret into the ring and Jock stomps the crap out of his knee. The Quebeccers give Bret a wishbone splitter. Jock locks in a half boston crab but Owen breaks it up. Pierre scores with a second rope leg drop. The Quebeccers try there double team cannon ball move onto Bret's knee but Bret rolls out the way. Bret goes for the sharpshooter but Bret collapses and the ref calls for the bell.

Owen yells at Bret after the match as Bret struggles to his feet and then kicks his leg out and then shouts into the hard camera. "All he tag to do was tag me, but he's too selfish". Road Agents and medics look after Bret after the match. They try to get an interview with Bret but they can't and they are unsure whether Bret can participate in the Royal Rumble.

.

Tom interviews Owen backstage, "I thought I had the best partner in the world, but he's too selfish", Owen says Bret stole his oppurtunity. We see Bret being carried to the back looking on at Owen's interview. Owen then says he's worried about himself now, and seeing as Bret stole his Tag Titles then he'll win the Rumble and the World Title.

.

IRS tells the crowd to pay their taxes and Gorrilla Monsoon and JR take over on commentary.

Razor throws the tooth pick at IRS and then slugs IRS down and out of the ring. IRS introduces Ramon to the turnbuckle but Razor comes back with a huge right hand and IRS bails again. The crowd are all over IRS. Razor scores with a shoulder block, Razor catches a big boot and spins IRS into a back suplex. IRS then tosses Razor over and out to the floor. IRS introduces Razor to the steel steps and then scores with a closeline. IRS scores with a body slam in the ring and heads up top. IRS sees the foot coming and lands on his feet puts Razor's leg down and scores with an elbow drop. IRS goes to a chinlock. "Razor" chant. IRS scores with a super sloppy kitchen sink. IRS nails a leg drop between the legs. IRS scores with a snapmare and a leg drop for two. IRS goes back to the chinlock and uses the rops for leverage. Monsoon has managed to say "kisser" four times already. Razor fights up to his feet and Razor unloads and he floors IRS with a discus punch. Fallaway slam gets two for Razor. IRS whips Razor into the ref. IRS gets breifcase but Razor sees him coming and nails IRS with the case but there's no ref. IRS recovers but misses a closeline. Razor puts IRS on top and scores with a second rope back suplex. Razor calls for the Razor's Edge. HBK runs in and nails Razor with the "real" IC title and both men are down. Everyone is down including the ref. IRS crawls over and gets the win, the crowd are shitting all over the finish. Earl Hebner runs out and explains to the ref what happened, IRS is celebrating with the belt on the second rope and Razor scores with the Razor's Edge for the win.

We then go to a video backage with Taker and Paul Bearer making Yoko's casket and a general recap of the fued, "Yokozuna, I don't make mistakes I bury them". Its pretty funny stuff. "The only thing you will hear Yokozuna is the hounds of hell baying for your soul". "Fear not Yokozuna, you shouldn't be afraid, you should be terrified, Rest in Peace". We then get Jim Cornette complaining about the contract. We then go to a clip of Yoko threatening to squash the casket when Undertaker pops out, and Yoko runs scared, great sell by Yoko.

.

Yoko says he's gonna kill Taker and we go to a staredown. Yoko misses a blind charge and Undertaker scores with two closelines but Yoko doesn't go down but the front flip Taker line gets him. A throat thrust sends Yoko through the ropes and Yoko stumbles into the ringpost. Yoko introduces Taker to the ringsteps but Taker no sells it and throws Yoko into the steps. Taker scores with the Rope Walk of Doom. Taker misses with the Takerline and crashes to the outside. Yoko goes for a chair but Taker blocks it and hits two chairshots of his own. Yoko throws salt in Taker's eyes and then hits Taker in the back with a chair. Yoko hits another shot this time to the back of Taker's head with the chair. Yoko ramns Takers head hard into the steps twice. Yoko scores with a running closeline and tries to put Taker in the casket but they can't close the lid. Slugfest. Taker gets a series of throat thrust but Yoko explodes with the side belly to belly. Taker sits up and gives Yoko a horrible chokeslam not as bad as the Hogan one though. Taker scores with a really nice running DDT. Taker does the cut throat motion and asks for the casket to be opened. He has Yoko lying in the casket but before he can close it Crush comes running out. Taker kills Crush with a shoulder block, Kabuki and Tenaru attack but a double closeline deals with them. Bam Bam runs in and now the numbers game is starting to tell. Yoko is out cold in the casket. Mr. Fuji has stolen the urn. Yoko is awake but Paul Bearer beats up Fuji and Cornetter and reclaims the urn. Taker recovers kicking all four mens arse. Adam Bomb runs in, Bam Bam misses Taker and hits Tenru with the salt bucket. Taker unloads on everyone with the salt bucket. Jeff Jarrett runs out and comes off top but that has no effect. The Headshrinkers comes in and floor him with a double superkick. Bearer comes on the apron with the urn and Taker sits up. Diesel now runs in and they still can't close the coffin as he comes back fighting everyone off. Yokozuna takes the urn and nails Taker with it. Yoko opens the urn and green smoke comes pilling non stop out of the urn. Crush scores with a suplex and Double J scores witha second rope fist drop, Deisel gets a elbow drop and Bam Bam gets a second rope headbutt, Samu and Fatu both hit top rope slashes. They then roll Taker into the casket, close the lid and lock him in it for the win.

They roll Taker's casket up the rang, Taker's music hits and the green smoke comes out of the casket and the lights go out. Taker in the casket appears on the video screen and he looks angry into the camera. The soul of the Undertaker lives in all of man kind, and the ever lasting spirit, it cannot be explained, all of mankind will witness the rebirth of the undertaker, he will not rest in peace. The screen flashes green, then explodes and Taker ascends in green on the video screen. Then in the arena the casket opens and green smoke pours out and Undertaker levitates to the top of the arena. Paul Bearer re appears by the casket with the urn by the casket. The crowd go nuts as Bearer holds the urn up and wheels off the casket. Just incase anyone thought wrestling was real watch this match.

.

Entrant Number One is Scott Steiner. Entrant Number Two is Samu. A kind of hused muttering silence has overtaken the crowd after the end of that Taker match. Samu scores with a corner closeline. Scott explodes out of the corner with a closeline and he then scores with a butterfly powerbomb and its Rumble lifting time. The crowd are really dead. Stiener gets a leapfrog and turns into a big closeline. Entrant Number Three is Rick Stiener. The crowd have come to life now. Rick goes straight to lame Rumble lifting. Rick scores with a side belly to belly suplex. Scott scores with a suplex, Rick scores with a flying closelin, Samu misses a diving closeline and gets hung in the top rope and then eliminated Samu is Eliminated. Entrant Number Four is Kerwang. Kerwang spits green mist into Rick's eyes. Scott is trying to check on Rick but Kerwang keeps unloading on him. Scott scores with an overhead belly to belly suplex. Entrant Number Five is Owen Hart. Owen gets a big boo and he goes straight for Rick who is still selling like he can't see. Owen does a lift and actually eliminates Rick. Rick Steiner is Eliminated. Entrant Number Six is Bart Gunn. Bart unloads on Owen, Scott scores with an inverted atomic drop on Kerwang. Apparently something is going on backstage but nothing is going on in the ring. Entrant Number Seven is Diesel. Diesel unloads on everyone with elbows before giving Owen a knee in the corner. Diesel then tosses Bart, Scott, Owen, he dodges a spinning heel kick and tosses Kerwang. Bart Gunn, Scott Stiener, Owen Hart & Kerwang are Eliminated. Entrant Number Eight is Bob Backlund. Bob roll around the ring and gets an ammatuer wrestling leg lift and nearly takes Deisel out but is soon tossed. Bob Backlund is Eliminated. Entrant Number Nine is Billy Gunn. Billy unloads but soon runs into a boot and is tossed. Billy Gunn is Eliminated. Diesel then plays to the crowd to an increasingly face reaction. We go to footage of Tenru and Samu assaulting Lex Luger with weapons backstage. Entrant Number Ten is Virgil. He squares up but is shoved hard into the corner twice in the corner, apparently Virgil is an alternate for Kamala. Diesel misses a blind charge but scores with a hard forearm and tosses Virgil. Virgil is Eliminated. The crowd come to their feet chanting "Diesel". Entrant Number Eleven is Randy Savage. The crowd go nuts, Randy dodges a closeline and unloads on Kev. Savage takes Kev hard into the corner and then unloads with some big jabs. Savage is struggling to lift Diesel. Savage keeps unloading. Entrant Number Twelve is Jeff Jarrett. Jeff saves Nash and unloads on Randy with a snapmare and flurry. Body slam by JJ and he follows up with a second rope knee drop and a dropkick. Jeff goes up top and scores with a flying closeline and begins to strut and says he's gonna toss Savage but Savage does a brilliant job of hanging onto the top rope and sliding under the bottom rope. Savage gives JJ a high knee into Diesel and then tosses him. Jeff Jarrett is Eliminated. Entrant Number Thirteen is Crush. Randy dives to meet him and Savage scores with the bombs away axe handle, he scores with a body slam then nails another bombs away. Crush scores with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and Deisel gets a knee drop. Crush scores with a thrust kick. Entrant Number Fourteen is Doink. Crush tosses Savage. Randy Savage is Eliminated. Deisel and Crush brawl as Doink stands in the corner laughing. He sprays water in both of there faces and then treds on there feet. Doink can't body slam Nash and the heels double closeline Doink. Entrant Number Fifteen is Bam Bam Bigalow. Crush and Nash hold the ropes open for Bam Bam and Bam Bam promptly press slams Doink over the top rope. Doink is Eliminated. The three heels turn on each other with some uninspiring brawling. Entrant Number Sixteen is Mabel. The crowd chant "Whoomp Dere it is". Mabet and Diesel clash and Kev gets the knees in the corner but Mabel comes back with an avalanche and then a corner closeline, Mabel then gives Crush an Avalanche and then one for Bam Bam. Entrant Number Seventeen is Sparky Plugg. Bob is filling in for X-Pac. Its blandness all round. There all on the ropes hugging each other. Entrant Number Eighteen is Shawn Micheals. HBK and Kev have a big stand off, Shawn backs off but Kev comes forward but they shake hands. Everyone including Michaels then eliminates Kev. Deisel is Eliminated. Kev gets a big ovation and a "Deisel" chant for his effort. Entrant Number Nineteen is Mo. Mo goes for Micheals and the crowd really want HBK out. Mo whips Mabel into Bam Bam while HBK skins the cat to stay in the ring. HBK tries to body slam Mabel but ends up getting Body slammed himself. Entrant Number Twenty is Greg Valentine. Its lame action all round. Greg hits Mabel into Mo and Bam Bam. Mabel scores with some big chops of Valentine. Mabel whips Mo into Bam Bam but misses himself with a splash. Entrant Number Twenty One is Tatanka. Shawn is press slamed by Crush. Tatanka and Micheals unload on each other, Tatanka wins and HBK does his oversell. Micheals lands on the apron when Greg tries to eliminate him. Entrant Number Twenty Two is Kabuki. HBK body slams Bob Holly and then drops and elbow. Bob then scores with a snap suplex on HBK. Everyone except Mo eliminates Mabel. Mabel is Eliminated. Entrant Number Twenty Three is Lex Luger. Luger unloads on Kabuki, Luger nails everyone. Luger tosses Kabuki. Kabuki is Eliminated. Luger gets a lariat on HBK. Lex floors Mo. Lex scores with a closeline on Bam Bam but Crush nails Luger with an inverted atomic drop. Entrant Number Twenty Four is Tenru. Tenru scores with some knife edge chops on Luger. Lex fires back but an eye rake stops that. Tenru lays three big chops on Lex. Entrant Number Twenty Five is a no show...we presume its Bret Hart. Luger nearly eliminates Shawn as HBK continues to sell and bump around. Entrant Number Twenty Six is Rick Martel. Martel is noticably off the roids hmmmn...I wonder why. Anyway he does nothing of significance. Entrant Number Twenty Seven is Bret Hart. So who the hell is number twenty five. The crowd go nuts. Crush gives Bret a knee stomp. Entrant Number Twenty Eight is Fatu. Crush tries to body slam Bret out but Luger makes the save and Bret falls on top of Crush. This really is lame action. Four men toss Crush. Crush is Eliminated. Entrant Number Twenty Nine is Marty Jannetty. Marty and Shawn unload on each other. Shawn counters a ten punch with an inverted atomic drop. HBK misses a superkick and Jannetty scores with one and nearly tosses Shawn. Marty tries suplexing HBK over but Shawn counters and scores with a suplex. Entrant Number Thirty is Adam Bomb. Vince's commentary is just horrible. Bret tosses Sparky. Sparky Thurman Plugg is Eliminated. Apparently Bastion Bogger was the missing man at least they addressed it. Its pretty tame brawling everywhere. Its still tame two minutes on. This is the definition of tame brawling. Vince says its the most taxing rumble ever, to the viewer maybe. Bam Bam scores wth a lame back elbow. HBK is working over Bret's leg. Bret sends Shawn shoulder first into the ringpost. Martel gets rid of Greg Valentine. Greg Valentine is Eliminated. Tatanka back body drops Martel out. Rick Marktel is Eliminated. Luger dodges a closeline and Adam Bomb goes out. Adam Bomb is Eliminated. Mo is Eliminated. Tatanka is eliminated. Marty scores with an inverted atomic drop and a closeline on Shawn. Bam Bam misses a charge and Flair flips to the outside, HBK headscissors Marty Jannetty out of the ring. Bam Bam Bigalow and Marty Jannetty are Eliminated. Tenru gives HBK and Samu a noggin knocker. Lex and Bret whip HBK and Samu into each other. Luger and Bret eliminated Tenru. Tenru is Eliminated.

Shawn flips out of a back body drop and he tries to dump Bret and fails. Fatu floors Bret with a back elbow. HBK scores with a inverted atomic drop. Fatu scores with a second rope chop. Shawn and Fatu try to suplex Luger but he lands on the apron hits Shawn into the top turnbuckle for a monster oversell, and he gives Fatu a closeline for an oversell. Lex and Bret try to whip HBK and Samu into each other but they evade each other and charge the faces and both men get back body drop over the ringpost and out. Fatu & Shawn Micheals are Eliminated. Bret and Lex Luger are left. Slugfest. Lex tries a body slam but Bret slips out and they both bundle each over the top rope and neither ref had a view of who landed first. Bret Hart and Lex Luger are Eliminated? They play Luger's music and then Gene Okerland is told by Earl Hebner that Bret is the winner and his music hits to a much bigger pop. They stop the music again and the two refs argue over which man has won.

After the match Jack Tunney comes out and decides that its a draw.

.

Overall Thoughts: Quite a memorable show for the big angles, Owen turns on Bret, HBK sets up the Ladder Match with Razor, the insane spectacle of Undertaker dieing and the controversal finish of the Rumble itself. Unfortunately the wrestling itself wasn't stellar merely solid throughout. So its hard to recommend this show but its also not easy to dismiss it, it depends how interested you are in big angles.