Daveportivo's Cultural Evaluation Facility

What better way to start off a over the top and highly prentious list than with an over the top highly prentenious single and video. Classic ballad or bloated up it's own arse peice of shit? No one really knows for sure.

Yes amazingly back in 1999 we all fell in love with a stupid puppet called Flat Eric. Behind it was a subversive club "banger", well the very loosest definition of the term, regardless this song and that puppet flogged a whole lot of awful jeans.

God you know it's the 90s when the Producer is called U-Neek. I have to admit this is a personal favorite of mine. It's completely stupid OTT hip hop, complete with shotgun blasts every other second. Featuring James Alexandre's favorite ever line "My Nigga Bone Got The Chrome Nigga".

Could there be a more sleazy, cheesy annoying nineties track than this? Well yes, and its probably still to come in the list. There's something about his whiny croon that makes you hope the girl or guy he's wailing about to him to fuck right off. Enjoy this "live" performance.

Ludicriously pompous Mad Max video + super slick oh so nineties Dr. Dre beat + passable Tupac Rap = hip hop phenominon. This is such as sleazy track, the beat just makes you want to do some ludicrious gangsta walk parody. So Welcome Everyone to the Wild Wild West!

With a suitably over the top stadium sized Guns and Roses riff and a huge call and repeat chorus this was early Manics stadium rock pomp at it's best. Perpare yourself for James Dean Bradfield's best Axl Rose impression.

So we just had a Axl Rose impression now it's time for John Squire's best Hendrix impression as he just manages to keep the monsterous skyscraper of a riff under control.

I warn you now don't call it a comeback, apparently he's been here for years. Yes before he made wank R'n'B jams with J-lo, Ladies Love Cool James used to make ludicriously cheesey in your face hip hop like his life depended on it.

So it was the late nineties and Madge needed to reinvent herself, which of course after 1992 was code for get someone else to reinvent Madonna on her behalf, this time it was William Orbit's job, the result's were mixed but Ray Of Light proved a huge success. Madonna for the Microsoft generation.

Some songs just never die and for some reason House of Pain never will. But then again it has all the qualities of classic cheese; goofy white boy rapping, check, lyrics so insanely easy to remember that morons can try and look cool in clubs by making a big point of knowing them, check, and of course a chorus that makes you jump, check. All bases covered.

Okay I promised myself I'd only include one Will Smith song otherwise I'd have put in at least twelve purely to amuse myself. I thought I'd go for his most successful track and movie of the nineties, even if it's not his best single of the period.

God Ash are a dull band aren't they, they had some solid hits, but they've always been generic and forgetable, but thankfully for three and half minutes in 1995 Ash were friggin awesome.

"Fuck 'em, And Their Law" I know this song was written over ten years ago but we could really do with a track with this must visercal rage as we are in the midst the biggest assualt on our civil liberties in modern British history in the war on "Terror".

While pop music has been succesfully reinvent in the noughties there's no way we could have surived the 90s without the endless creativity and genius of Missy Elliott, seemingly the only lady with an original though in her head in those dark days.

The last of the great Pulp singles of the nineties. Witty razor sharp lyrics from the one and only Jarvis Cocker but the song will probably be more famous for Jarvis's legendary performance on the Ali G Show.

It feels wrong to put one of Noel's finest songwriting moments so low down on the list but it never really garned the success or the impact its songwritting quality deserved. It's a shame that horrid track like Roll With It managed to get to number two and this tender moment didn't.

A gloriously floaty silly pop song, that while smultzy always retained and honestly and was superbly delivered Nina Persson's soft voice.

See I warned you there'd be a heafty waffed of fromage in this list. But it's meant to be an honest reflection of the decade and could there have been a bigger hit than this. Shame all I can think of when I hear this song is Chris O'Donnell and Val Kilmer *shudder*.

Our Gwen Stafani used to be such a creative force, full and rage and dripping with sarcasm, those days are long gone, I hope see returns to form with her next record but here's a reminder of her talents, encapuslating the laddette movement perfectly.

This song is soooo late nineties, Nina's lyrics are superb, I should say her deliver is superb as she wasn't the song writer for the Cardigans. The tone of rebelious distain dropping into dispear was sublime, a great largely forget pop gem, I suppose when it comes to pop bands from Sweden your pretty screwed, how the hell do you get out from under Abba's shadow? Abba never had cool car crash videos though!