Daveportivo's Cultural Evaluation Facility

The crowd is much better tonight, chanting "Austin Arsehole" right off the bat, before going to a "you tapped out". It's been a long time since I've seen Aries work heel so I'm looking forward to his. Aries flips out of an arm wrench and gets a fireman's carry before dropping a leg drop on Kenny's arm before wrestling circles around Aries and slapping the shit out of Omega.

Omega responds with a shoulder tackle but runs into a pair of Japanese arm drags and a shoulder tackle. Omega fires back with an arm drag, a drop toe hold and a drop kick in combination before playing to the crowd and grinding his hips. Aries is pissed off how and he gets in Kenny's face before hitting a stiff knee to the gut. Aries dodges a round house but can't avoid a mule kick, Kenny then flip flops and flies allover Aries until Austin decides to put of the breaks and watches Omega crash and burn.

Omega unloads with a pair of chops in the corner and gets a head of steam before hitting a running forearm strike and a huge palm strike which sends Aries over the top rope. Kenny tries a drive but Aries grabs his feet and sends Kenny crashing into the ring apron. Austin is met with a round of "Austin Arsehole" chants before he hits a running knee strike on the apron. Aries hits a reverse elbow before hitting a snapmare and a NERVE PINCH!!! In Ring of FUCKING Honor, who does he think he is.

Omega fights out but only into the gutbuster-STO combination, Aries follows that right up with the momentum elbow drop for a two count. Aries lays some knees into the back before applying the stump puller style figure four. Aries takes some time to stare out the crowd. Omega blocks the Brian buster and then floats over before hitting a leaping spinning back kick that seemed to land right in the balls. Omega hits a spinning enzenguri and Aries does a comedy sell.

Omega hits a series of Polish hammers before hitting a hard Irish whip and a back body drop. Omega gets a couple of near falls before fliping over Aries and hitting a sloppy fameasser for a near fall. Omega says its over and he goes for the electric chair but Aries slips out. Aries misses a blind charge and in a terrible looking spot hands himself in the ropes will Omega dropkick kicks him to the outside.

Omega hits a moonsault press to the floor on Aries and the crowd start a big "ROH" chant, it took four episodes (well three as I haven't seen them all yet). Omega pulls Aries into the electric chair but Aries grabs the ropes. Omega gets a knee strike combination and again goes for the Electric chair but Aries rakes the eyes and throws Omega hard into the ringpost and hits a brutal corner dropkick. Aries then calls for the brainbuster and duly delivers for the 1-2-3. Fanastic sell their from Omega.

Jerry Lynn then does his best but cuts a dull and silly sounding promo.

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Ernie Osris cuts a terrible promo before Nana drags him away. God a hobo gimmick, this guy best lose in less than a minute. Delirious cuts a Delirious promo.

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Delirious goes Delirious to start the match. Earnie runs away but is soon caught with a headlock takedown and Delirous steals Earnies shoe. Wow, now this is bush league. Delirious no sells head pounds in the corner. Dirty Earnie rubs up against Delirious who tosses him accross the ring before hitting a neck breaker. Earnie comes back with a jaw breaker and a sling shot jaw jacker Randy Savage style. Earnie goes up top but is killed with a headbutt to counter. Delirious hits the never ending story closelines. Delirious hits a leaping lariat for a two count. Earnie elbows his way out of a fireman's carry and hits a nice driving knee, curb stomp eske move. Delirious counters the bump rush and scores with a brutal panic attack. Delirious mercifully finishes Earnie with the Shadows over Hell for the 1-2-3.

Jimmy Jacobs cut a promo of Brodie Lee's behalf explain that Necro Butcher and Tyler Black left the age of the fall becuase they were to weak to stay true to the cause.

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Sweeney and Del Ray are up next, Sweeney was pretty funny as he attempts to chat up Sassy Stephie (yes who is she and why is she on telly, I don't have a scooby). Daizee and Nevaeh cuts a hokey promo, she's okay but she's too cutesy for wrestling.

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Haze and Del Ray lock up but Haze gets a quite a leg trip and Daizee drops a series of knees on the arm of Del Ray. Del Ray gets some knees to the gut and goes for a gut wrench powerbomb but Haze counters nicely with an arm drag. Nevaeh (that's Heaven backwards) and she gets a neck snap and roll up for two. Haze tags back in but Del Ray powers her opponents into one another. The faces then hit a double neckbreaker. Del Ray gets in her tag partners face allowing Haze to sneak in with a roll up for two. Death Ray is pissed now, and kills Nevaeh with a big boot before tagging in Sassy Stephie. Stephie grabs a front face lock, Del Ray has seen enough and tags her self back in and unloads on Nevaeh. Sweeney gets into the face of a fan at ringside its pretty funny. HOT TAG! Haze comes in and cleans house. Haze hits a wrap around closeline before scoring with a second rope Torpedo Dropkick. Haze hits the heart punch and Yakuza kick combo for a near fall. Death Ray makes the save, but Nevaeh dropkicks Ray out of the ring and hits a flying crossbody of the apron. In the ring Haze finishes Stephie with the Mind Trip.

This is without doubt the weakest looking ROH main event on paper. The crowd are behind Lynn from the off but it doesn't help Lynn as Broadie shoves him down hard. Lynn evades Lee but can't dodge a straigh boot. Lynn floats out of a powerbomb but is immediately met with a double leg trip. Lee puts Lynn on the top rope and pats Lynn on the head.

Lee asks for a test of strenght, Lynn goes to the top rope and uses the test of strenght to arm drag Lee. Lynn just stops in the corner and allows Lee to walk in slowly and bitch slap him. Lynn avoids a knee drop, Lynn dodges a sunset flip but misses the sit down counter. Lee then tosses Lynn to the outside, this is just a dire start.

Lee hits some horrible slugging offence before choking over Lynn in the ropes to the thrill of absolutely no one. Serious who books this crap. Lee hits a powerslam for a two count, serious this is sub ECW. Lee applies the back breaker submission, this is like an Undertaker match from 1997. Lee decides that we were having far too much fun and slaps on a chinlock. God there's nine minutes left they've got to pick up the pace surely. Well no as Lee applies some forearms to the back. Lynn goes for a sunset flip but Lee avoids it and hits a Mikinouku Driver for a near fall. The crowd come to life but Lee casually tosses Lynn.

Lynn counters a powerbomb on the outside by back body dropping Lee on the outside. Lynn tries a cross body but is caught by Lee and ramned into the ringpost. The crowd sarcastically chant "Fuck 'em Up old Guy". Jimmy Jacobs comes out to add some entertianment and he jokes Lynn. The crowd wake up and chant "die Jimmy die".

Back in the ring, the brief burst of entertainment is over as Lee hits a hard Irish whip. One fan shouts "I want you to put this old man out of his misery", not heeding this advice Lee adds to our misery by slapping on the BEARHUG!!! IN ROH. This is awful. Lee misses a big boot in the corner crotching himself on the top rope. Lynn hits some horrible closelines which Broadie no sells before Lynn scores with a nice Ranna.

Lynn comes off the second rope with a nice Torpedo Dropkick but Lee bails, because we really need more standing around. Lynn follows up very nicely with a helo tope. Lee does a terrible cliche spot were he just leans in adn Lynn botches the slingshot leg drop. Lynn follows up with the TKO for a near fall. Please just end. Lee catches Lynn on top and scores with a hip toss off the top rope for a near fall. Lee hits a big boot in the corner before Lynn runs straight into a bossman slam. Lynn then gets a small package out of nowhere for the win.

They hyped Albright vs. Claudio for next week show, great another heavyweight match that in no way seperates ROH from WWE.

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