Daveportivo's Cultural Evaluation Facility

The show opens with a kind of cool weirdly cut Diamond Dallas Page video where he claims Scott Stiener has no answer for the Diamond cutter. Tony Schiavonie has a very interesting line to open the show "Proffesional Wrestling that means Greed". The crowd and arena is pretty small and the camera angles are tight.

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Kee Wee who has no business being on PPV and he sneak attacks Jett who responds by whipping him into a stage hand and then scores with a superkick and a press off the top. They call Jason Jett the future of WCW. Back in the ring Jett scores with a body slam and a Vader Bomb style leg drop for two. Jett fakes a groin stomps and then applies a reverse crab swinging surfboard combo. They both and Irish whip and Kwee Wee drops him. Kwee Wee then toss Jett over the top rope by his hair in a very cool spot. Jason Jett side steps a suicide dive. Jason then counters a back body drop with a rebound DDT off the ropes to the outside. Jett then scores with the Afterburner and a standing moonsault gets two. Kwee Wee gets a leap frog and then back body drops Jett over the corner and all the way to the outside. Kwee Wee then chokes Jett with a wire and then Jett takes the front flip bump into the guard rail. Back in the ring Kwee Wee gets two. Kwee gets a body slam and then a Thez press for two. Kwee pounds Jett face into the mat and the crowd chant "Kwee Wee sucks". Kwee then applies a chinlock, Jett tries to fight out but Kwee Wee drags him down for two and then scores with a vertical suplex for two. Another big Kwee Wee sucks. Kwee Wee puts Jett on top and pounds away to a chorus of boos. Jett responds with a blatant low blow and then Goes for a Super Bomb but Kwee Wee counters with a Hurricanna for a near fall! Kwee Wee then counters a hurricanrota with a sit out for two. Kwee Wee plays to the crowd. Jett blocks his piledriver and hits another blatant low blow? Does this man know the rules. Jett hits the Shockwave (hand spring elbow) and kips up. Kwee Counters the Crash Landing with sunset flip for two. Jett counters the piledriver but can't avoid the Northern lights suplex for two. Jett leap frogs over a blind charge and we have a collison with Kwee Wee flying to the outside. Jett tells the crowd to be quiet and plays dead. Kwee Wee goes up top and Jett rolls out the way of the flying elbow and score with the Crash landing for the win.

We go to a video recaping the WCW Cruiserweight Tag Team Tournement.

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Tony says that Rey has got better since taking the mask off. Kidman is pressed onto the apron and he rebounds back in with a headscissors in a nice spot. Romeo scores with a reverse powerbomb. Elix comes in and press Romeo onto Kidman for two. Kidman comes back with a dropkick. Rey tags in and Drops The Dime on Prime Time whose laid across the middle rope. Rey rebounds over the top of Elix and then gets a unique flying head scissors. He then gives Prime Time a body scissors over the top rope. Kidman scores with a baseball slide on Prime Time. All four men brawl onto the ramp and Kidman hip tosses Romeo off the ramp onto Prime Time. The Animals then fly off the ramp with a flying senton and Thez press on the heels. The Animals then score with a douple chokeslam for two. We then have an awkward spot where Skipper scores with a knee strike. Romeo beats up Kidman on the outside while the referee is distracted. Romeo tags in and hits a short arm closeline before playing to the crowd. Kidman explodes with chops and a diving lariat. Romeo counters a wheel barrow move into a bulldog before locking in a super exciting chinlock. The crowd come to their feet as Kidman fights out but he runs straight into a front suplex for two. Prime Time comes in and beats down Kidman. Prime Time pounds away on Kidman and then jars with the fans. Prime Time whips Kidman into the guard rail. Kidman wears Tommy Hilfiger jeans incase you were wondering.

Kidman comes bakc with a sitout spine buster from the second rope and Rey gets the hot tag. Spring board crossboyd and then a swinging DDT on Romeo. Prime Time runs into a boot and then misses a char and goes shoulder first into the ringpost. Kidman gives Romeo back suplex, Rey comes off top with a cannon ball on Romeo and then runs accross the ring and gets a suicide dive on Prime Time. Romeo scores with a press to the outside on Rey and Kidman follows up with the Shooting Star Press to the outisde onto Prime Time and Romeo. Rey scores with a sunset bomb on Prime Time for two. Prime Time gets a reverse headlock takedown on Rey. Kidman scores with a reverse suplex on Kid Romeo. Prime Time gets a Tiger Suplex and Romeo follows up belantantly with guillotine leg drop. Kidman breaks up the pin and gives Prime Time a swinging bulldog. Rey and Kidman get the powerbomb splash combo on Romeo for two. Kidman gives Prime Time the baseball slide to the groin and Rey gets the Bronco buster. Rey drives over Kidman and hits Romeo with seated senton. Kidman and Prime Time go flying over the top rope together and Romeo counters the Lionsault to the Last Kiss for the win.

Bagwell then has his own personal camera and goes to see CEO Ric Flair, Animal and Jarrett. They discuss how they are the elite seven and they say tonight is their night.

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Stacy Keibler comes to the ring looking fine but wearing far too much clothing for my tastes. She demands a bigger ovation from "you people". Stacy says she's gonna introduce us to the Shawn and Stacy show. She then introduces the Mecca of Manhood Shawn Stasiak the man who rocks her world. Shawn ges the big entrance and they kiss. The crowd boo as Shawn sets up to talk. Stasiak tells the crowd to shut up, listen and learn. He says he has agents knocking down his door, he then makes fun of bald people and Bam Bam Bigalow. Shwn has bought pictures of himself for all of us, and that was our brush with greatness for tonight and he throws pictures into the crowd.

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Tony Schiavone suggests Bigalow has the power to screw Shawn up into a little ball and throw him into the crowd. Should Bigalow actually manage to pull this game off I will ultimately give it five stars without hesitation.

Shawn dodges Bigalow and throws a jab and then makes fun of Bigalow. Shawn grabs a side headlock and then scores with a shoulder tackle. Stasiak kips up dodges some closelines and then gets nailed with a right hand. Shawn bails and buries his head in Stacy's crotch, can't say I blame him, especially if the alternate is grappling with Bigalow. Shawn Stasiak is ridiculously overselling this punch as are the announcers. A kiss from Stacy Keible soon has Shawn feeling better.

Shawn hides in the ropes to avoid locking up. The referee enforcers a clean break and Stasiak jumps Bigalow and unloads. Bigalow throws Shawn into the corner and unloads. Bam Bam follows up with a hard Irish whip and a back body drop. Bigalow getsa splash in the corner and a weak dropkick. Shawn goes for a time out with Stacy but Bigalow goes to break it up. Bigalow gets distracted by Keibler not that I can blame him and he's shoved into the ring steps.

Back in the ring Stasiak hits a flying cross body and plays to the crowd. Shawn cuts off Bigalow who was beginning to hit headbutts with a low blow? Okay another match another low blow and still no DQ. Bigalow returns fire with a low blow of his own and then hits a headbutt and a Diving Headbutt. Stacy gets on the apron and distracts Bigalow by taking her hair down and throwing Shawn a canister to Stasiak. Shawn sprays the hair spray in Bam Bam's eyes and the Hangman's Noose Neckbreaker gets the victory. Stacy bends Shawn over backwards and lays in a kiss.

The Cat is with his girl friend and he says hes gonna take care of Kanyon, its shot from a CCTV camera.

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We then see Skipper and Kid Romeo celebrating its mean to be gay, its not actually that gay.

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Storm asks if he can be serious for a minute. Storm says tonight he gets personal and tomorrow they move on to business. They say they are getting rid of Morris and Konnan and then they are moving on to the World Tag Team Titles. They won't play the Canadian National Anthem but Instead Hugh Morris runs in.

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Hugh Morris runs in and back body drops Storm to the outside but he's quickly back body dropped to the outside. Mike Awesome regains control with a closeline. Storm unloads with chops but Morris no sells everything and then hits a powerslam. Awesome comes in with a terrible big boot and leg drop for two. Awesome scores with a Stinger Splash and then Lance tags in and they score with a double closeline. The crowd chant "USA" as Lance has a front facelock. The commentary is beyond retarded at this point as they go to a collision spot. Konan tags in adn unloads with his rolling closeline, Konan went for an x-factor but Awesome breaks it up with a lariat.

Awesome scores with a body slam and a splash as the crowd have a sporadic chant of "USA". Team Canada use such exciting moves as the choke and the foot choke. Lance Storm catches Konan charging with a reverse elbow for two. Awesome tags in and unloads with even more uninspiring offence. While Awesome distracts the referee Storm introduces Konan into the ringsteps and the gaurd rail. Konan gets an inside cradle for two. I know I've mentioned it already but the commentary is really terrible. Lance awkwardly knocks Konnan down as the crowd come to life. Awesome comes off top with a awful looking shoulder tackle for two. Awesome then plays to the crowd. Storm then over shoots a dropkick by a long long way. Storm drops two leg drops and then cinches in a chinlock. The crowd can't even muster a USA chant. Morris gets a tag but the ref doesn't see it. Awesome then scores with a piledriver on Konan for two. Storm comes back in with a body slam and he goes up top and he eats foot. We then get a double closeline spot.

Luke Warm Tag, Morris gives Awesome a spinning heel kick, the crowd are actually angry that this match won't end. Morris gets a couple of splashes in the corner on Awesome but he turns an eats a huge splash from Awesome. Konan makes the save at two. Hugh dodges two closelines and hits a back suplex. Hug Morris goes up top but Lance distracts Morris and Awesome hits a running Awesome bomb for the win.

We go to CCTV footage of Dustin and Dusty. Dusty Rhodes says he's gonna eat two hundred and fifty burritos so his arse smells when Flair kisses it.

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It gets even gayier as Rick Stiener tells Buff Bagwell he will pound Booker T's butt.

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Then we go footage of Jindrack and O'Haire who say we'll find out who the best tag team are by the end of tonight. We then hear the sound guy say that's a rap.

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I forgot how funny Shane Helms entrance was. Chavo locks in a side headlock and won't let it go. I mean seriously he won't let go alla Shawn Micheals if he's going 60 minutes but much less interesting. They then trade snapmares, kip ups, hammerlocks and headscissors. Shane grabs a side headlock but Chavo shoots him off and after a fair bit of closeline dodging Chavo gets a running closeline. Chavo gives Shane a hard Irish whip, but Shane flips over Chavo's suplex attempt and lands on his feet with hits a gut wrench suplex. Chavo avoids the nightmare on Helmstreet and scores with a T-bone suplex.

Chavo then applies the looses STF well since the last time John Cena applied the hold. Chavo works over the leg in a variety of deathlocks. Shane breaks it with a chinlock but Chavito answers him with a nice backsuplex for two. The crowd is flatter than Kelly Kelly's stomach. Chavo counters a dropkick with a roll up for two. Chavo then counters a powerbomb landing on his feet and then hits a DDT for two. Chavo ties Shane in the corner and nails a dropkick. Chavo scores with a pump handle suplex for two. Tony calls the colour guy Gordon Solie like, you gotta be kidding me?

Chavo monkey flips Shane to the outside, and Shane responds by pulling Chavo off the apron. Chavo slips back into the ring and hits a baseball slide and then a flying press of top to the outside. Chavo rolls Shane back into the ring for two. Shane blocks a suplex and then floats over and scores with a TKO style face crusher. Helms then counters a backslide with swinging neckbreaker. The ref begins a ten count and you can see the crowd yawning. Shane press Chavo to the apron and then superkicks him off the apron.

Shane rolls Chavo back into the ring for two. Chavo dodges a superkick and hits a reverse DDT bomb for two. Shane counters the Tornado DDT, then Shane blocks the pump handle suplex and scores with the Nightmare on Helmstreet for two! Shane then whips Chavo to the corner and he takes the Harley Race bump to the outside. The crowd chant "Boring" loudly. Shane silences them with a flying crossbody to the outside.

Shane then scores with another crossbody this time in the ring for two. Shane body slams Chavo but when he goes up top Chavo pops up and brings him down hard. Shane and Chavo battle on top and Shane counters Chavo's Vertebreaker into his own Vertebreaker for the win.

The crowd pop pretty reasonably for Shane's title win with his Sugar Babies.

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We're back with Bagwell's camera man and now its following Jarrett. Jeff goes into Ric's office and they say they won't be kissing anybodies arse. Ric was actually pretty funny in this promo and very sharp.

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Booker then cuts a serious promo and tells Rick to remember one thing, Don't Hate The Player, Hate The Game. Boy oh boy did they pick the wrong catch pharse for Booker to run with.

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Just incase the crowd were getting to excited Lex Luger grabs a microphone and poses. Buff tells the crowd to shut up. Lex says when you look as good as us, are built like us, and no one wrestles like they do. They then do some really gay arse licking. They then say they did what nobody else could do and took Bill Goldberg out of WCW. Lex Luger says even when your as successful as them and doesn't finish that sentance. Lex then makes fun of Palumbo and O'Haire and says one day they'll be as big as them. They promises to take their opponents to school.

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This match could possibly the most roided up match of 2001. Worryingly someone has a Buff Bagwell sign in the crowd and its not a girl. O'Haire and Palumbo's music is really gay and annoying.

O'Haire and Palumbo charge the ring and slug down Totally Buff. They give Lex a double shoulder tackle. Luger accidently gives Buff the Lariat and Chuck gives both Buff and Luger Jungle kicks. Then Sean hits two loose Seanton bombs for the win. The announcers call it a Georgia Championship Wrestling squash.

We go to a short angry and incomprehensible shouty promo from Scott Stiener.

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When we come back Luger and Bagwell are still recovering from that match and look like pensioners as the crowd chant "refund".

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The Cat then cuts a promo calling Kanyon's face ugly.

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Kanyon goes straight after Missess Jones but Cat cuts him of and introduces him to ringsteps cast first. The Cat dodges a closeline and scores with a shoulder tackle. Kanyon tosses Cat who fucks up skinning the cat and comes back in with the electric chair drop. The Cat tells us he's the greatest as he throws Kanyon into the canvas. Kanyon tries a ten punch but the cast on his arm hurts so much and Cat gives Kanyon a powerbomb and then tosses Kanyon.

Kanyon goes straight after Ms Jones and then flips Kanyon into the gaurd rail. Cat then whips Kanyon into the gaurd rail cast first. Kanyon repplies with a jaw jacker and then a flying closeline gets two. Kanyon scores with vertical suplex and a sling shot elbow drop fort two. The Cat runs into the boot and Kanyon scores with the leg drop bulldog for two. Kanyon then senses the crowd aren't quite thrilled enough locks The Cat in a chinlock.

The Cat fights out but runs into a sleeper however The Cat immediately counters into a back suplex. Cat floors Kanyon but Kanyon comes right back with a swinging neck breaker for two. Kanyon goes up top but Cat kicks his legs out and crotches him hard. Cat then scores with a not so superplex for two. Kanyon goes for a sunset flip but Cat tells him to suck it and drops the James Brown elbow, the splits and throat thurst and finnally the Round House Kick gets two. Kanyon then with no energy gets a roll up with his feet on the ropes for three. The ref says he saw it and restarts the match. The Cat gets a roll up for two.

Kanyon counters a roll up with a boston crab but Cat makes the ropes. The crowd reached a murmur during that exchange. The Cat gets a hard Irish whip and the Feliner but Kanyon gets his foot on the rope just before three. Kanyon throws the Cat out of the ring. Cat gets back in dodges a closeline and goes for a back suplex, Kanyon hits Cat with the cast but only gets two! Kanyon then hits the ref for no reason. Cat holds Kanyon back for the Miss Jones but she hits Cat with the round house kick. Miss Jones tells Kanyon to bring it on and Jones hits a round house kick and The Cat scores with the Feliner for the win.

Post match Kanyon floors Cat with the cast and a Flatiner. Kanyon is about to attack Miss Jones and Smooth's music hits and he makes the save, to bring the story full circle.

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We then see Bagwell and Stiner arguing backstage.

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We then go to a video recap of the Booker T-Rick Stiener fued. Its actually pretty dramatic and made this fued look hot. Shame I know Book isn't a good enough worker to raise Rick Stiener above awful. I hope I'm proved wrong.

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Rick tells the ref to check Booker's gloves and then slugs Book down and takes Book to the outside. Ric throws Booker into the front row and then tells the camera man to film it. Booker is selling Rick punches like he's being KOed with every punch.

Back in the ring Rick scores with his Stienerline for two. Rick scores with a sloppy Tiger Driver for two, but that excited ment end when Rick instead decides to apply a variety of chin and face locks. Steiner blatantly low blows Booker and then applies a surfboard. Booker powers up and scores with a back suplex. Rick dodges the Harlem side kick and scores with a belly to belly suplex for two. Booker gets his sunset flip for two but is then run straight over with a hard lariat for two. All this is of course way too exciting so Rick decides a chinlock is in order, a long one. Booker fades and then fights out. Book dodges a closeline and gets his diving forearm then a hard spinebuster and then he scores with the Ghetto Blaster (scissor kick. Book nails with a flap jack and Booker accidently hits the ref with a Harlem side kick. Stiener nails the German suplex but of course there's no referee. Shane Douglas comes from ringside hits Rick in the back of the head with a cast and Booker hits the Book End for the win.

We then seeing Animal and Luger arguing as Buff Bagwell has been laid out and there is no trust.

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We then go to a recap of the Rhodes-Flair fued. It's really silly. I have to say I didn't know that Jeff Jarrett had a take on Kid Rock's cowboy as his entrance music.

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Good to see that Ric is taking this match so seriously he's wearing cords and a Hawian shirt. I guess is this when he was still embarsed about his look but he actually looks comically awesome. Dustin Rhodes for some reason appears to have stolen The Mounties wardrobe. Ric says he's not dressed to wrestle and he's not going to wrestles Chosen Ones gonna do it all by himself. Flair then changes his mind, okay. Road Warrior Animal is then ejected by Charles Robison.The crowd are chanting for "Dusty".

Jeff isn't thrilled about locking up with Dusty as the stallathon continues. Dustin starts instead, Jarrett slides through Dustin's legs but gets slugged down, same thing happens with a leap frog. Dustin then scores with a drop down uppercut. Dustin then gives Jarrett a ten punch with a crotch grab before crotching Jarrett on the ringpost. Dustin comes off the top rope and is met with a boot.

Ric Flair tags in to a face pop, of course. Flair hits a chop then its a Flair Flurry time and an eye rake. Flair just pounds the crap out of Dustin and then makes fun of Dusty. Flair kills Dustin with one chop. Dustin holds onto the rope and gives Flair the fingure before tagging in Dusty. Dusty dances and tells Flair to hold his horses. The crowd are actually on their feet for the first time.

Dusty scores with a shoulderblockt o a big pop and then shakes his derriere in Ric's face before threatening Flair with a Bionic elbow. Dusty blocks the Flair Flurry hits Flair with a bionic elbow and the flip flop and fly. Dustin tags in and Jeff tries to slow him down but he suplexes Ric anyway. Jeff gets a inverted atomic drop for his trouble. Dustin sets up Jeff for the dust buster (shattered Dreams) but Ric cuts him off with a low blow. The crowd chant for Dusty as Ric lays in the boots. Dusty dodges a back elbow and runs into a sleep but he shoots Jarrett off and applies a sleeper of his own. Jeff counters with a knee breaker and works over the knee. Ric tags in but Dustin counters the Figure Four with an inside craddle for two. Dustin coutners a hip toss into a backslide for two. Jeff tags in and locks Dustin in the figure four. Jeff gets a couple of near falls before Dustin turns the hold over, which the cameras miss. Jeff tries to reapply the hold but Dustin kicks him off and scores with a back suplex.

Both men are down and the race is on. HOT TAG, Dusty gives everybody bionic elbows then the double Dusty flurry on both heels at once. Dusty scores with the back elbow and the Elbow Drop of Doom for a near fall. Dusty gets a double closeline and Dustin comes in with a diving double closeline. Jeff floors Dusty with a low blow and Ric gives Dustin a snapmare. Both heels go for figure fours but they are both kicked off and collided. Jeff falls to the outside. Dustin gets a odd looking pack for the ring. Flair flops and bails.

Dusty tells Flair to kiss his arse, Jeff runs in and Dustin holds Jeff down and gives him a weak stink face. I've never heard a man other than Tony Schiavone want to see a man's arse so much. Dusty dances in his underwear after the match.

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DDP spits on Stiener and unloads, DDP scores with a inverted atomic drop and a swinging neckbreaker. Scott comes back with a shoulder tackle calling DDP a "bitch". DDP comes of top with a flying cross body for two. The brawl to the outside where Stiener gives DDP a weak whip into the guard rail and then an incredibly sloppy closline. Scott jars with the fans shouting "sit down faggot" classy. DDP tries to come back with a jaw jacker but Stiener knocks DDP off the apron and they then brawl into the audience.

Stiener beats DDP up by the technical area. Scott nails DDP with a trash can lid, Stiener then takes a crutch from a kid and shoves the child over. Poppa Bump then smashes the crutch over DDP. DDP then hits Scott with the other crutch and hits a elbow drop through a table for two. Scott never kicked out fo that in a million years by the way. DDP hits Scott with a trash can for two. They brawl back towards the entrance. Scott takes a sign from a fan and shoves him over and floors DDp. DDP gets a sign of his own and kills everyone.

Scott Stiener low blows DDP as they return to the ring. Scott gets a Stienerliner and the cocky elbow drop and press ups. Scott gets his reverse whips and back clubs. Scott then scores with a T-Bone suplex for a near fall. Just incase anyone was enjoying this match too much, and we wouldn't want that Scotty locks in a bearhug. Page clubs his way out but runs into an overhead release belly to belly suplex. Big Poppa Pump then continues to unload with the stiff chops and lays some boots in. Page throws Scotty into the corner but runs right into a boot and Scotty hits his twisting belly to belly suplex for two. Scott decides to apply the somewhat more interesting surfboard hold. DDP really oversells and nearly escapes but eats a knee. Page then comes back with a DDT out of nowhere and both men are down.

Both men get up at the same time, Page dodges a closeline, as does Stiener but second time lucky Page floors him. Page getsa big right and ten head pounds in the corner. DDP runs into a back elbow and gets a near fall with his feet on the ropes. DDP counters a spinebuster with a swinging DDT. DDP calls for the Cutter but Scott spins him round and gets a low blow and a DDT. DDP throws Scott into the corner and hits a Diamond Cutter for the 1-2-but Rick pulls the referee out.

DDP hits a plancha on Rick and then gets a roll up on Scott for a near fall. Stiener scores with a jaw breaker and hits Page with the world title, busting Page open. Scott then decides to lock in a boston crab but Page dripping huge pools of blood makes the ropes. Scott then locks Page in the Steiner Recliner and Page fades but suddenly recovers and makes the ropes. Rick beats up Page while the referee is distracted. Midajah distracts the ref and Scott beats the crap out of Page with a lead pipe and then locks in the Recliner for the win.